teens/tweens

Digital Use: A Deep Dive into Attachment

Digital Use: A Deep Dive into Attachment

Without a secure bond with a trusted, stable adult, kids are more prone to social media addiction. The nature of Internet communication leads to a digital intimacy that falls short of authentic, vulnerable relationships so they keep grasping for more approval and acceptance.


Empathy in Action! How I Active Listened my 17 yo

Empathy in Action! How I Active Listened my 17 yo

He grinned down. I grinned up. Then, shaking my head in wonder, I went to my journal to record this remarkable conversation.

"Remarkable" because the old Catherine would not have known what to do. I probably would have peppered him with questions, "What's wrong? Well, have you tried approaching him again? Did you ask him why you you got that score? Have you gone over the rubric - maybe you missed something?"

What I Learn From Teens

What I Learn From Teens

These teens work hard.

Some are lucky -- they take the course with friends who will whisper, "Hey, send an I-Message!" or check, "Do you want me to Active Listen or do you want my advice?"

Others -- buoyed only by an 18 hour respite where they got to glimpse another reality -- reenter a world defined by winners and losers, full of blame and shame and "I get the last word."

Making Chocolate When You've Never Tasted It

Making Chocolate When You've Never Tasted It

Felicia, a recent graduate of the P.E.T. course, spoke to a new cohort of parents:

You deserve self-compassion. Ask yourself, 'What do you need? Anything?' This is hard work. We were also children and we are trying to make chocolate without knowing what chocolate is!

The look of This woman totally gets me was on every single grinning face in that sunny room.

Off to College

Off to College

A few weeks ago, I spent two days at your university, listening to deans, advisors and mental health professionals tell us parents how to support you and your classmates in the upcoming year. I was pretty relaxed; nothing they said was too jarring.

It all made me wonder: What would this moment be like had I not learned P.E.T.?

Letting Go of the Story

Letting Go of the Story

"One way under the anger and blame you are both feeling is to ask yourself: If I had to let go of the story of how the other person is wrong, what would I have to feel?"

A Clear Path

A Clear Path

That softening and willingness to take in someone else's perspective had the startling effect of her daughter picking up a towel and starting to dry the dishes. "We got over it within a matter of minutes whereas before it would have meant a ruined Sunday afternoon," Therese gushed.

Oh, the gratitude we all saw in her wide, winning smile and bright eyes!